Pixel Position . Conversational SEO

Hewlett-Packard (HP) has done their best to sell me an Apple computer. How? I have spent well over 30 hours dealing with HP issues – time with Customer Care, troubleshooting, restoring lost files, researching problems in technology forums and returning products.

Why am I writing about this? Partially to complain but mostly to use my challenges as an opportunity to remind businesses of the importance of customer service.

Customer Service and product quality affects Word of Mouth Marketing – how people talk about you. What they say affects how others spend their money. Every touch point with your company affects your reputation. Money follows!

I’ve been “listening” to what others are saying about the Mac OS X and have been salivating over their excitement about Apple products. Plus, you can’t buy a new PC with Windows XP. Who wants Vista? All of this “talk,” along with my personal experiences with HP, are shaping my opinions about how I spend my money.

My money is following away from Windows and HP. Let me tell you why HP sold me on Apple…

My HP Baby

My life revolves (almost) around my HP Notebook. It’s been my work and entertainment center for almost 2 years. I treat my HP like a child and in many ways love it.

I defrag, clean registry files daily, update for latest virus protection, and am on-guard against spyware. I buy accessories for it and ensure it’s decked out.

When my HP baby speaks, I listen. Our “conversations” go something like this:

• Oh, you want a Notebook Expansion Base? Sure!
• You want the high-dollar wireless mouse and keyboard. OK, you’ve got it!
• An Analog TV Tuner? OK, I’ll even spend more money each month to ensure you have your own digital converter box from AT&T. You are worth it!
• New clothes? Your 17″ widescreen format is too big to fit into my leather Couch briefcase, so I bought a new Swiss laptop carrying bag to clothe you.
• We are inseparable when traveling, but your battery runs down easily. So, you asked for a Combo Auto/Air AC Adapter. You got it as an early Christmas present last year.
• I love you enough to buy short-term life insurance for you, the HP Extended Services Plan for $259. I hope nothing goes wrong, but my relationship with you is co-dependent. I can’t take the chance I’ll loose you.

I don’t have children, so my computers (and my bikes) are my babies. My knees go weak when they ask for bling. Now, I’m considering a new child and new investment in Apple. My husband will adopt my tricked-out HP baby.

HP Customer Care

I have multiple service tickets on record with HP Customer Care. The experiences have left me screaming.

1. HP “doctors” were ready to help when my Windows XP OS had problems with Windows Explorer and Search/Find issues that locked up my OS. Two Customer Care reps researched and researched. One very nice guy “found” the problem in his knowledge base. Two hours later, he walked me through changes to the win.ini file, cleaned out the temp directory, etc. HURRAY! I could search for a file again! Three weeks later, the issues started again. The pain of the long phone call HP was too fresh for me to call again.
2. Memory error messages, inability to search for documents on the computer, problems with Adobe Flash. Symptoms persisted. I have received no answers or solutions.
3. Inability to install Microsoft updates. Unable to remove programs. This is too much! Can I find another 2-hour block of time to call HP?
   
4. My HP Notebook started pooping out while traveling, crying “Battery Critically Low.” At a recent SEO conference, it turned itself off when it was accidentally unplugged – notes lost. The AC Adapter was at fault. NOW it’s time to call the doctor, again. The next call was close to THREE HOURS! Yes!

Lessons Learned about HP

My baby’s life insurance, HP Total Care “award-winning” customer support, meant I was given a direct line to zap my energy and suck the breath out of my lungs and my work days.

1. HP Customer Care “receptionists” are from India - nice and pleasant but hard to understand. (It took three phone calls just to get past the rep who answers the phone in India.)
2. HP Customer Care “doctors” speak English. They do the best they can and are very friendly. They appear to really care, which speaks volumes.
3. HP accessories are not guaranteed to work. The mouse and keyboard that came with the Expansion Base failed twice. I returned them twice. The Expansion Base rocks and holds up great! I learned from a forum that failure of the mouse and keyboard is a common problem with the HP Expansion Base’s wireless accessories. I learned that if I really like the Expansion base, I needed to I forked out more money. I purchased the more expensive HP keyboard and mouse combo. Both left me stranded eventually, and I invested in Logitech.
4. HP Air/Auto/AC Combo Adapters may not have valid serial numbers. My power supply caused my baby to have travel woes. It wasn’t recharging the battery and only worked while plugged in. The robotic response I received was, “I’m sorry. Your batter is not covererd under extended warranty.” Calmly I explained this was not a batter issue. Finally, Customer Care verified my diagnosis. BUT, HP could not replace it without a valid serial number. I purchased it through HP Shopping telesales, and they had my records, which took a LONG time for them to find. I repeatedly heard, “I’m sorry, we cannot replace your device with an invalid serial number.” Four escalated phone calls later, the issue was resolved. I have a new travel adapter!
5. HP will not replace defective RAM. I have had multiple faulty memory calls. But since I cannot duplicate the issue for a rep to see, they do nothing.
6. HP is not responsible for the OS. However, they sold me this OS, and this is my 2nd call to HP with the same issues, which got worse. Why? An HP Customer Care representative told me to delete some files 6 months ago. OOPPS. That was the wrong advice. Maybe they shouldn’t give advice that corrupts a customer’s OS. I paid $259 for HP Extended Services Plan and a direct line for “help.” The Customer Care rep’s “diagnosis” actually corrupted my OS. Customer Care’s “prescription” to heal my HP baby cannot be undone. It was misdiagnosed and mistreated. I will have to backup all my files, restore the system, and reload my software. I heard it again…“I’m sorry.”
7. HP keeps their prices down by selling an incomplete version of the operating system. No discs are sent with each computer. Recovery, as a result, takes 6-8 hours. Fortunately, I ordered a dual-drive HP with the second drive dedicated for recovery which will reduce the time in half. It should only take 3-4 hours, now.  Oh, relief?
8. HP Customer Care representatives are very nice, say “I’m sorry” a lot. They do the best they can given internal phone routing problems with product, sales and customer support databases that don’t sync with each other.

When the latest rep apologized and explained my only solution was to reformat and restore my hard drive, my response was, quote:

“You have to be kidding? I’m going to buy an Apple.”
Silence.
“You’ve probably heard that before.”
More silence.

Why YOU should care about Customer Service

It’s imperative that every business owner evaluate customer service and how customers are treated.

• Are customer needs addressed professionally? Are they satisfied?
  
• Are knowledge bases accurate and current?
• Do databases talk to each other – sales, customer service?
  
• What will you do if your customer service reps give out the wrong information?
• How are your customer service reps trained to handle calls that fall outside “standard” policies?
• Are they trained to give robotic responses, or are they empowered to make decisions?
  

Money follows the answer to each of those questions.

Every touch point in your company affects your reputation.

More importantly, relationships with your customers are affected. Your reputation is on the line. It’s easier and less costly to sell to an existing customer than to acquire a new one. Why would you break your customers’ trust? If you do break it, their money will not follow. People will talk about you. Word of Mouth Marketing is a powerful force. It could be said,

“Money follows how the mouth speaks.”

I’m not spending more money on software for Windows or on HP computers or accessories. I will miss my baby, but my “relationship” with HP has been soiled. Now you know how HP sold me on Apple.